Wednesday, September 17, 2014

B1G Recap Week 3: #Gophers Fall on Their Furry Faces Edition

You guys, look how awesome Mayor Royce is...
Frankly, I'd rather turtle up with a bottle of bourbon than talk about the other teams, but I'm pot committed here in week 3.  One quick post-TCU gripe before we get into what happened elsewhere.

We've all heard the overwhelming narrative from the Gopher coaching staff.  It goes something like, "Sure we had some things that we need to fix, but did you see how freaking fast and awesome-o TCU is???  I mean they're very very good and probably should just move straight to the NFL."

This isn't the obligatory, we lost to a good team and we need to do better diatribe; this was more like we're Clay Davis illegally supporting Mayor Royce on his bid for re-election.  Sheeeeeit.  I just don't need us tripping over our dicks congratulating TCU on their way to the national title.  Especially because after SMU this week they get #4 Oklahoma, #7 Baylor and #25 Oklahoma State.  After those 3 games we'll know what TCU is about.  We'll also probably have a good idea how much of last week was our suck vs their OMGsuperawesome.


West Virginia 40, Maryland 37

I watched the bulk of this one and it was fun as hell.  At first it was all Clint Trickett and thw Mountaineers, but Maryland came back from a 22 point deficit to make it a ballgame.  Then some back and forth culminating in a field goal for WVU as time expired to take it.  If you get a chance to watch Clint Trickett play QB, I highly recommend it.  He threw for 511 yards in this one and has 1,224 yards after 3 games.  He threw for 365 yards against Bama, so its no joke.  A lot (460) of those yards go to WR Kevin White, which is about 100 yards more than Leidner has.  /broken record

Maryland QB CJ Brown also recovered from a rough start to have a nice game.  He threw for 241 yards and ran for 161 yards, including a run for a 75 yard score and a pass for a 77 yard score.  

Favorite fan comment:
I hope he's talking about the shotgun formation.

Next week:  @Syracuse
Prediction: Moar points


Indiana 42, Bowling Green 45

James Knapke hit Roger Lewis with 00:19 on the clock to get the win for the Falcons.  Knapke threw the ball 73 times, but only for a 5.4 yards per attempt.  They still had 40 rushing plays and a 100 yard rusher in Travis Greene.  Quick goat math says that's 113 plays on offense for BG.  Wow.  Indiana got more bang for their buck as they had more total yards on 78 plays, but their D was doing them any favors.

For Indiana, Junior RB Tevin Coleman now has 437 yards and 5 TDs in two games.  He's still no Tevin Campbell

Favorite Fan Comment:

Anonymous: Yikes...BGSU look like animated endzone pylons.

Next week:  @ #18 Mizzou
Prediction: Frowny face


Kent State 0, Ohio State 66

One week after TJ Barrett looked like haggis, he comes back and throws 6 TDs against the Golden Flashes.  More like Golden Flushes, amirite?

Favorite Fan Comment:

Joshua: Which is the bigger boost to Ohio State's SOS, pounding Kent St or E. Carolina pounding the team that beat Ohio St?
Next week: Bye week
Prediction: Barrett + Coeds =Beautiful Strong-Armed Babies


Iowa St 20, Iowa 17

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh-hahahaha.  So, for the second half of the Gopher game we went to the bar to numb the pain/watch the bitter end.   As a bonus, this particular bar had the Iowa game on and the audio playing as well.  There were several obnoxious Iowa fans that I got to watch bellow and holler as the Cyclones beat them at home.  It was better than any amount of booze I could consume; but that didn't stop me from giving a strong effort.

Mark Weisman, was unimpressive again with 16 carries for 49 yards.  Maybe he only runs well against the Gophers? 

Favorite Fan Comment:

Rubberhead: I really hope they stop this series, playing ISU is like sticking your face in a pile of crap. Nobody ever wants to play ISU, it doesn't do any good. THey suck, and have ALWAYS sucked. And if they do beat you, then your entire week is a kick in the nuts.

Next week: @Pitt
Prediction: Wannstedt gone, but mustache still haunts locker rooms.


Miami OH 10, Michigan 34

Gardner Finds Butt, Teehee!

Gardner looked solid and the Michigan defense was great, holding Miami OH to 198 yards for the game.  Soph RB Derrick Green had a good game after being completely shut down against Notre Dame.  He more than double his total yards for the year by gaining 170 on the ground.  Sophomore TE Jake Butt had his first 3 catches of the year, one for the TD in the gif above. 

Favorite Fan Comment:

stan b: I wanted to support Coach Hoke, but Blue is not prepared. Let the recruitment for Harbaugh begin. Restore the tradition and pride. Go Blue
Next week: vs Utah
Prediction: Michigan loses, Hoke eats an entire pint of ice cream during the presser and cries.

Illinois 19, Washington 44

Have you noticed how many Shaqs or Shaquilles or other variations of Shaq that are out there now?  Kind of cool if you're Shaq I guess, but it also makes me feel really old.

Anyway, Illinois had 3 turnovers including an interception return for TD by Shaq Thompson.  Illinois QB Wes Lunt was also sacked 4 times in the game.  Meanwhile, Washington QB Cyler was extremely efficient and the Husky running game ground the Illini D into paste.

Favorite Fan Comment:
polly: I was angry that I could not see the illini game - now I do not want to watch this team the rest of the year... cancel the program at Illinois and add basket weaving
Next week: vs Texas State
Prediction: Illinois is favored by 14, but UTSA could shock!  They were relatively close against Navy.


Purdue 14, Notre Dame 30


Next week: vs Southern Illinous
Prediction: Tickets still available!

Penn State 13, Rutgers 10

So much weird.

A Tale of Two Low Scoring Halves

First half:  Rutgers 10, PSU 0
Second half: PSU 13, Rutgers 0

I thought this was going to be a shootout, but sadly it was not so.  Hackenburg and Nova had been stat machines up until this matchup and while Hackenburg had 300 yards, he was unable to get a TD through the air and the run by Belton with less than two minutes remaining was the only Nittany Lion touchdown.  Gary not so Super Nova was even worse.  He was 15-30 passing, sacked 3 times and 5 interceptions. 

Favorite Fan Comment:
Ken:  Gary F*ckup Nova loses another one for Rutgers. LMAO. A senior QB not knowing where the line of scrimmage is, panicking time after time for no reason, throwing 5 interceptions, unable to do anything in the second half - what's so funny is that after a few more of these, the idiot Flood will hold an "open" competition and then solemnly declare that Nova gives them their best chance to win. What a screwed up program.
Next week: vs Southern Illinous
Prediction: Tickets still available!


Nebraska 55, Fresno State 19

 How's this for an all-namer:
Garrett Swanson punted. De'Mornay Pierson-El returned punt for 86 yards (Drew Brown made PAT)
Abdullah was good, Armstrong was good, the defense was pretty good too.  Good all-around game for the Pellinikittehs.

Favorite Fan Comment:
Yep: Nebraska got a wakeup call last week. Plus Fresno has one of the worst defenses in the country. 59-24 is my prediction.
Guy almost nails it!

Next week: vs Miami (does |__| fingers)
Prediction: Nebraska favored and now #24.  This is a good test.

No comments:

Post a Comment